For all those like me, who've been away for a few days, here's a round up of the current soap action.
Well, as far as I can make out anyway.
In "Days of our LIs", Ivan has dumped Elvis and run off with John, who may turn out to be Racer X's a) long lost half brother, b) arch enemy or c) alter ego.
Meanwhile at Shillington Manor, the "Brown Trousers of POS" has awoken his evil minions of Shill from their winter slumbers to stalk the forums of Earth, destroying all before them with their "Gobs o' sh*te."
The Croatian telecoms industry and customs dept have some "issues."
UPS is more expensive than gold per ounce.
RMR has the best product reliability (none of them work).